5 Things Everyone Gets Wrong About Mental Illness

By J.F. Sargent January 30, 2014 347,447 views

If there's one thing we can all agree on, it's that mental health care in the United States is as broken as a Trent Reznor sad-off with the Cure. Being the "quickest, simplest fix we can muster" creatures that we are, we decided that we should patch it with one simple law and then never talk about it again.

But that's not enough, because mental health is an astronomically vast and complex issue with wildly varying degrees of severity. Our current system can't even begin to tackle the library-length definitions because we're still fumbling around at the most basic levels. For instance ...

#5. It's Freaking Impossible to Get Treatment

If you're lucky enough to have generalized anxiety/PTSD/phobia/obsessive compulsive disorder (to list the most common disorders), you may already have a pretty solid understanding of this entry since, statistically speaking, no one has ever helped you. Just because your brain has turned on you faster than your drunken aunt at Christmas dinner doesn't mean you're actually going to get a ticket on the treatment train to Curesville.

Of the 46 million Americans with a mental health problem, only 38 percent end up getting treatment. Among those who don't, 7 percent don't want anyone to find out they have a problem, 17 percent don't know where to go, and 50 percent just plum can't afford it. Doctors who specialize in making sure your brain doesn't have a demon [pooping] in it are the hardest doctors in the country to find: Almost 90 million Americans live in "Mental Health Professional Shortage Areas." What does that mean? Well, take a look at this chart:

Via Raconline.org
I FUCKING SAID LOOK AT IT!

It means that in parts of our country, there is one psychiatrist for every 30,000 citizens. Considering that 1 in 4 Americans has a diagnosable mental disorder, that's roughly the equivalent of a single NFL referee explaining the last call to each person in the stands individually.

But that's just the numbers-icing on the can't-get-treatment cake. The real problem here is shame, which I guess is trans fat in this metaphor. [], I'm hungry. The thing that sets mental health problems apart is that no one's ashamed of getting the flu, and fighting something like cancer even wins you some social bonus points. But aside from the occasional Oscar-bait Ron Howard flick about triumphantly overcoming your cartoonishly simplified version of schizophrenia, insanity is just comedy fodder. Once you're diagnosed as mentally ill, if you're not the butt of some joke about acting weird ("You total nut job!" or "That's mental" if you're Ron Weasley), your entire experience will be dismissed as something quirky ("I have such OCD about not wanting dog poop in my pasta!"). And since most mental illnesses are easy enough to hide, it can seem simpler to just not tell anyone and suffer alone. And that's the problem: If you skip your cancer treatment, everyone will think you're crazy. If you skip your psych meds, no one will.

Besides, treatment is expensive, and not just in how much you pay: Being mentally ill makes it harder to keep a job, so a diagnosis [] your wallet from both ends. But unlike the flu, you can't just get over most mental illnesses. They're like the One Ring of Power: The longer you keep one around, the worse its hold over you gets. So you decide to take off your shoes and walk your creepy-looking feet to the local volcano to finally do something about it. But when you show up, you find 17 different pools of lava and 20 different volcano guides telling you you're at the wrong one, because ...

#4. The "System" Is Made of a Bunch of Organizations That Don't Communicate

When you hear the phrase "mental health care system," you probably imagine a bunch of organizations passing files around and wearing fancy suits and using big businessy words with each other, but in reality, there's pretty much no inter-departmental coordination in mental health care. According to experts, they all just stumble around like visiting family members in the kitchen over the holidays: They're ostensibly working toward the same goal, but doing so in totally different ways, stubbornly insisting that theirs is the only way that makes sense, utterly refusing to talk about it, and drinking lots of cheap red wine while calling your cousin a worthless []. If you're a kid with an illness, the school you attend, your counselor, and the juvenile justice system (which you will most likely become acquainted with) are all likely to recommend totally different things -- or even repeat treatments just because paperwork hasn't been exchanged properly. Experts insist that "system" isn't even an appropriate word to describe it, but I suppose "[]" isn't entirely appropriate for textbooks and government reports.

And every part of the system is specialized. An emergency room, for example, can help someone who is on the verge of hurting himself, but once that immediate problem is treated, they're done. The patient is sent home with a stern "don't try to kill yourself again," and nothing treats severe depression better than a stranger in a white coat making perfunctory professional remarks.

It's such a mess that people in desperate need of help have no idea what to do or who to contact. Parents have actually called the cops on their own kids to get them arrested, hoping that throwing them headlong into the system would actually get them the help they need. That might help explain why half the people in prison have mental health problems. I (briefly) taught a poetry workshop in a federal prison, and to me, that fraction seems a bit small -- but it helps explain why so many people in prison end up reoffending when they get out. No matter what [] up game your brain is playing on you, being locked in a tiny room isn't going to help.

Again, the differences between mental illness and physical illness are thrown into sharp relief: Breaking the law to pay for your cancer treatment is a TV show. Stealing to eat because you're too anxious to work isn't even a headline.

#3. Mental Illness Has a Lifetime Membership

While many physical illnesses are recurring, most mental illnesses last forever. No matter your treatment, you never get to slay that final boss and [] his smoldering corpse because there are no cures for mental illnesses. That pill you take? That therapy? Whatever it is, there's no solution you're working toward -- you're just trying to make it as easy as possible to live with and manage your affliction. It's part of your life now. Forever, like a bad case of "I'd like to hear some funky Dixieland" echoing in your thoughts until the day of your sweet, mortal release. Even after your symptoms disappear.

What sets this apart from most recurring physical illnesses is that the stigma stays with you, too. That difficulty finding a job we mentioned earlier? That's not something that goes away once you get treatment -- you just learn how to manage it so you don't end up rotting away in your apartment as, one by one, the utilities disappear. The best you can hope for is going into "remission," but since "the lack of symptoms alone is not an adequate gauge of remission," lots of people will never feel like they have any control over when that remission happens, or what it even is. You're just waiting for someone else to tell you that your brain is working again. Forever.

So what does that mean in terms of the system? Well, with regular physical health care, unless your problem is ongoing like diabetes or terminal like the self-punch virus, patients will show up, collect their cure, and then disappear for the next half a year. It's why physical doctors can take on so many patients. It's in-and-out.

Mental health care, however, is oftentimes a lifelong commitment involving not only medication, but counseling and psychiatric evaluations that require more frequent trips to the doctor and close personal interaction. Treating a cold is easy because the symptoms are always the same and it goes away on its own. Treating any of the five types of schizophrenia is an ongoing process that requires constant medication and professional monitoring. Just getting a correct diagnosis of the problem can take months. Sometimes, years.

#2. Misdiagnoses Are Everywhere

In the 1970s, Dr. David Rosenhan was wondering if we were any good at identifying crazy people, so he launched an experiment. He had eight totally healthy "pseudopatients" admit themselves to a psychiatric hospital and then proceed to act completely normal. The answer he quickly discovered was no, we kinda suck big ol' floppy balls at it. All but one of his patients were quickly diagnosed with mental illnesses, and some were forced to take antipsychotic medication before they were allowed to leave. Rosenhan concluded that the doctors in the ward had conditioned themselves to see insanity in totally normal behavior. In one case, they labeled a guy who seemed obsessed with lunch as exhibiting "behavior ... characteristic of the oral-acquisitive nature of the syndrome." In reality, he was just "showing up to lunch early because there's [] all else to do in a psych ward."

But that was 40 years ago, and that study was hugely influential -- things are better now, right? Not especially. One guy in England spent 20 years bouncing around different parts of the "mental health care system," including prison, while having every antipsychotic under the sun crammed down his throat like loading a Pez dispenser. But instead of the super-schizophrenia everyone assumed had afflicted him, someone eventually figured out that he had Asperger's syndrome.

Many diagnoses have more to do with the doctor's personal theories than the patient. Bipolar disorder, one of the most common disorders in the country, is initially misdiagnosed in 69 percent of cases, and one-third of those aren't figured out for a decade or more. One-third of people diagnosed with depression may actually have bipolar disorder, a disorder that needs entirely different medication. At this point, it wouldn't be surprising to walk into a grief counselor's office after your mother's funeral and walk out labeled a werewolf.

And as you sit in your apartment, studying the lunar calendar and taking your anti-lycanthrope pills, you wonder how that medication is changing your body chemistry. Is it rewriting your DNA? Is it suppressing the wolf chemicals that make you thirst for the screams of the innocent? Is it like full-body Rogaine?

Well, the thing is ...

#1. No One Knows How These Medications Work

I've known people who go through different kinds of psychiatric medication the way sensationalist news organizations assume kids go through video games: try one out to silence the raging voices in my brain, get bored, get a new one a month later, repeat forever. It's like chasing the dragon, only instead of the perfect heroin high, people with mental illness are hoping to wake up with a feeling that can be described with actual words instead of a long, tortured moan. And figuring out which medication works is a hell of a grind: 30 to 40 percent of patients won't respond to any given antidepressant, you won't know if something's working until you've been on it for six weeks or so, and some of them actually make symptoms worse. It's like playing a long, slow game of Russian roulette with your brain.

The reason picking an antidepressant is so much tougher than choosing a decongestant is because doctors have no idea how these medications even work. The explanations from antidepressant ads aren't just dumbed down marketing; they're actually not that different from what the scientists actually know.

Am I saying that you should stop taking your medication, or not seek mental health care because it's too f[] up? No. [], no. Don't ... is that the message you got from this? If so, I ... suck. Listen: If you need medication, go take it. It's good for you in a lot of cases. Talk to your counselor, if you're lucky enough to have one. Do whatever the hell you need to do to keep control of your life. And avoid taking any life advice from me in general. My life's a wreck. I don't even own a car.

What I'm saying is that when your doctor prescribes you medication and it turns out to not work or make you worse, you can't just label him a dumbass and give up. Taking medication for mental issues is far beyond tricky, to the point that they literally have to guess which one you need and then eliminate it if it doesn't work and try the next one on the list. Yes, the actual real life treatment path is like an episode of House. If they tell you it's lupus, just run away. Bad things are about to happen.

I wish I could offer some smart, helpful suggestions for fixing the mental health care system. But the truth is that if people much smarter than me with master's degrees and Ph.D.s and decades of experience can't get a handle on it, I'm pretty sure I'd crash the whole system and get genuinely sick people diagnosed as "just an []." But recognizing the problems is a good first step. I just hope they get it fixed soon, because it's kind of a ridiculous [] as is.

The Prodigal Son

In Luke 15 Jesus relates the parable of the prodigal son. As I have pondered this parable something has struck me as interesting. When we talk about the prodigal or hear sermons on it, it appears that the lost son has been completely restored into the family and that he again has all the perks of sonship. While this may be true on a personal and relationship level I don’t read it that way on an inheritance level.

It seems clear that the father has accepted his son back into the family and that he is to be treated as a member of the family. However, I think it is equally clear that the prodigal did not regain any inheritance in the process. The father clearly states to the older brother that “Son, thou art ever with me, and all that I have is thine.” Luke 15:31. If this is true the father had only the status of a son to give to the prodigal and nothing more. For the remainder of his life he would either have to make it on his own or live off the grace of his father, and then his brother.

As Jesus gave us this parable I think we need to seriously think on it and on what it means to be a prodigal, one that has been a child and then leaves only to return later.

Does this mean that we are accepted as a son of God, as in regain our salvation, but have lost all of our inheritance in the kingdom? Can a prodigal ever regain his inheritance? Must he go from getting his spiritual possessions as a right of his sonship and now must earn them? What is our inheritance?

These are some of the things I ponder.

The story is as follows:

¹¹ And he said, A certain man had two sons:

¹² And the younger of them said to his father, Father, give me the portion of goods that falleth to me. And he divided unto them his living.

¹³ And not many days after the younger son gathered all together, and took his journey into a far country, and there wasted his substance with riotous living.

¹⁴ And when he had spent all, there arose a mighty famine in that land; and he began to be in want.

¹⁵ And he went and joined himself to a citizen of that country; and he sent him into his fields to feed swine.

¹⁶ And he would fain have filled his belly with the husks that the swine did eat: and no man gave unto him.

¹⁷ And when he came to himself, he said, How many hired servants of my father's have bread enough and to spare, and I perish with hunger!

¹⁸ I will arise and go to my father, and will say unto him, Father, I have sinned against heaven, and before thee,

¹⁹ And am no more worthy to be called thy son: make me as one of thy hired servants.

²⁰ And he arose, and came to his father. But when he was yet a great way off, his father saw him, and had compassion, and ran, and fell on his neck, and kissed him.

²¹ And the son said unto him, Father, I have sinned against heaven, and in thy sight, and am no more worthy to be called thy son.

²² But the father said to his servants, Bring forth the best robe, and put it on him; and put a ring on his hand, and shoes on his feet:

²³ And bring hither the fatted calf, and kill it; and let us eat, and be merry:

²⁴ For this my son was dead, and is alive again; he was lost, and is found. And they began to be merry.

²⁵ Now his elder son was in the field: and as he came and drew nigh to the house, he heard musick and dancing.

²⁶ And he called one of the servants, and asked what these things meant.

²⁷ And he said unto him, Thy brother is come; and thy father hath killed the fatted calf, because he hath received him safe and sound.

²⁸ And he was angry, and would not go in: therefore came his father out, and intreated him.

²⁹ And he answering said to his father, Lo, these many years do I serve thee, neither transgressed I at any time thy commandment: and yet thou never gavest me a kid, that I might make merry with my friends:

³⁰ But as soon as this thy son was come, which hath devoured thy living with harlots, thou hast killed for him the fatted calf.

³¹ And he said unto him, Son, thou art ever with me, and all that I have is thine.

³² It was meet that we should make merry, and be glad: for this thy brother was dead, and is alive again; and was lost, and is found.

GOD DOES NOT NEED YOU

Jeremiah 27 : 13

Jeremiah 27 : 13

Why will ye die, thou and thy people, by the sword, by the famine, and by the pestilence, as the LORD hath spoken against the nation that will not serve the king of Babylon?

 

Would God ever let me be ruled over by Babylon? He did it with Israel and Judah. He actually let them be ruled over by several different nations up to the current days.

Why would God let someone rule over his people? Why would he let another act as a shield for his people? Would he let them instead of doing it himself?

How does he do this in my life? He has put the government over me and my boss and my pastor and I am OK with this. He could just do the things they do for me on his own but has given this role to them. BUT, first I have to submit to them.

As with the Israelites, Jeremiah was speaking to they had a choice to make – submit or fight back.  But if they fought back they were not just fighting against Babylon but against the authority God had given Babylon to rule over them. God determined that the people would be put under their yoke due to their disobedience and turning from him.

But what about me? Am I under the yoke due to my disobedience? By accepting Jesus and repenting of my sins haven't I been set free from the wages of my sin? Does this mean I don't need anyone over me. That I am set free from the control of the Government and others? Can I just send a letter to t eh President and tell him that as I am a Christian I am not under his authority and can do whatever I want. I know some have taken it this far but is it what God wants?

Jesus himself had Peter pay the taxes due to the Roman Government for the two of them. If he recognized that there was a level of physical authority that he needed to obey this tells me that I must likewise recognize the physical authorities over me.

Israel was put in the position of having dual authorities over them. A physical authority, Babylon, and an ultimate spiritual authority, God. As Jeremiah told them if they would bear the yoke of Babylon they would be safe and free to live in their land and worship God. If they refused they would be destroyed and driven from the land.

God does this today in my life. I have to submit to the physical authorities over me because God has placed them there while at the same time recognizing that the ultimate authority over my life is in God. Our government places a yoke upon us and demands that we obey their rules and pay taxes to them to support the government and the policies it deems proper whether we agree with them all of not.

This is the civil authority God has placed over us and which we must obey so long as they don't subvert the laws of God and when they do we must choice who we will obey. Thankfully I live in a land where this determination can be made, generally, without open rebellion. However, at times it can place me in the position of disobeying the civil authorities if I must obey the supreme authority.

This is a dangerous line though as the civil authority has the power of the sword and will use it if it deems it necessary to control me and bring me into line with the civil authorities rules.

When must I step out from under the civil authority over me and say "NO – I will follow God on this." Am I willing to accept the consequences of this decision? What do I do today that appeases the civil authority at the cost of disobedience to God? What would I be willing to do to appease the civil authority? Would I deny Christ? – NO. Would I permit that which God says must not happen? I already do this. God's laws are clear on many issues that the civil authorities permit and God declares that they should not be permitted.

Paul lived with this same dichotomy. He was as committed to Jesus as any man ever to live but he was also a Roman citizen and used that citizenship to protect himself. Ultimately, it was that Roman authority that killed him because he was a Christian.

Is that the fate of any who place God's kingship over the authority of the civil government?

Thankfully in this country no, but in many countries around the world it is. Will that day come to this country? If things continue I believe it will. The day will come when placing God over country will become a crime and becoming a Christian will become an offence against the civil authority.

Can we stop this? I don't know. I believe it can be stopped but at what cost to our society. Would it mean the creation of a theocracy and if so what faction of the church would rule it? Would that be any better? I doubt it. It would probably end up much worse as the rulers would see them selves as on "god's" mission and thus whatever they did would be seen as ok.

I don't know. But I trust God.

I know that someday he will return and set up his government and then man will see true peace but until then I have to live within the confines and under the yoke of Babylon. But I know who my true King is.

Numbers 29 : 37

Numbers 29 : 37

Their meat offering and their drink offerings for the bullock, for the ram, and for the lambs, shall be according to their number, after the manner:

There is a process. God sets out certain processes and methods for doing things and accomplishing his will. In the OT these range from how to pray to how to kill your chickens – there was a rule and process for almost everything they did.

Today we cannot even seem to come to an agreement on how to do anything. Have we lost something by setting aside the processes in favor of "freedom." Is this really the type of freedom Jesus taught. Didn't he say he came not to change a jot or tittle of the law. I recognize that Paul writes extensively about our freedom from the law and the need to experience the law through Jesus' sacrifice and the freedom that brings but did he really mean that we no longer needed to follow all the processes of the OT?

In the OT days the people knew that if the followed all the rules God would bless them, except the rules were impossible to follow exactly. So they never knew the fullness of God's blessings. They always were lacking somewhere and thus there was always a gulf between them and God. Even Moses who spoke with God like speaking to a man couldn't follow all of God's processes and procedures due to his humanity and was accordingly denied entry into the promised land. How could the average man ever hope to  become right with God through these rules and processes?

Of course that is where the Messiah comes into the picture – the perfect sacrifice to bridge the gap from rules we can't keep and a God that demands them. A sacrifice that doesn't just cover past sins over but makes them as though they never happened and provides cleansing for our new sins. Does this mean I no longer have to follow the rules.

Many churches teach that the OT rules no longer apply to me while holding onto ones that they like. The pastor will tell me the rule against pork is set aside but the one dealing with the tithe isn't. The rule that says that a homosexual is committing a deadly sin is still in effect but I can get a divorce, even though Jesus himself spoke against divorce. Dancing and drinking may, or may not be a sin depending on the pastor and branch of the church as may be smoking and a simple tattoo.

How do we pick the rules we need to follow and which ones are no longer in force under the freedom we have in Jesus. Does this freedom mean we live in a lawless society where I can do anything as long as I claim Jesus as my lord and savior. Do the 10 commandments even have the force of law or are they just 10 old rules that I can follow if I want but I am free not to if the "spirit" moves me in another way?

Since I can eat pork and shrimp can I also ignore the tithe. They are both set our as rules in Deuteronomy 14 with equal force but why is only one now ok???????

Where do we dray the line and who draws is. I know a common answer is that through prayer and seeking God we can come to a comfort within our-self as to what is right but this is, in my humble opinion,  complete nonsense. Just because I have a comfort level with killing you does not make it right it just makes me a sociopath. We are told that we live under grace, does this mean I can just sin with impunity? Where is the fence? Paul tells us "⁹ Don't you realize that those who do wrong will not inherit the Kingdom of God? Don't fool yourselves. Those who indulge in sexual sin, or who worship idols, or commit adultery, or are male prostitutes, or practice homosexuality, ¹⁰ or are thieves, or greedy people, or drunkards, or are abusive, or cheat people—none of these will inherit the Kingdom of God." 1 Corinthians 6, 9-10. Obviously there are rules and fences we just need to look for them and recognize that they are not within ourselves but are set by God.

Jesus told us the most important commandment was to "37 . . . . love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' ³⁸ This is the first and greatest commandment. ³⁹ And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' ⁴⁰ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments." Matthew 22:37-39. He didn't say "follow me and ignore the law," he said that loving God with everything and loving others were the essence of the law. A law he came to fulfill.

So where does that leave me? What rules must I follow? If what I am doing meets these two rules is that enough? Think on them. Can I really ignore the rules and still say I love God with all my heart, soul and mind and my neighbor as myself? But if I decide I must follow all the rules does this mean I don't trust in the atoning blood of Jesus?

If I am truly free in Christ why does Paul say "that those who do wrong will not inherit the Kingdom of God?"

So many question marks – so few answers. I must think on this again.

--
Rod Knier
ministrare quam ministrari
(to serve rather than to be served)

Numbers 7 : 20

Numbers 7 : 20

One spoon of gold of ten shekels, full of incense:

A spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down. What do I bring my incense to God in, for that matter what is my incense? Do I even need incense?

I have heard it said that our worship is offered as an incense to God. Does that meant that only when I sing am I offering it up? Can I offer, as in this offering, my incense up once to God in bulk then be done with it? Just wrap it up in an expensive box and I am done?

Of course not.

In this situation the Israelites were offering up the initial offerings for the tabernacle. The priests then took these offerings and offered them before God. I assume that when these offerings were used up the people brought more to the priests.

Seems very impersonal – like having God on a payment schedule. Oh, I guess I need to make another incense payment this month. Is that really what God wants from me?

I believe God wants me to bring a continuous supply of incense to Him in this earthen vessel I call Rod. He is not looking for payments based on commitments and rules alone. He wants my honest and continuing incense.

My worship is to be offered to him not just on Sunday and once and again during the week but on a continuous basis. In the days of the tabernacle the priests were responsible to have incense burning before the Lord constantly.

How can I do this? By offering my life as a continuous offering of incense. Not just now and again but 24/7/365.

How do I make the incense? Can I just whip it up in the sink out of whatever I have laying around? A prayer here, a song there, and just ignore the other things I am putting into this earthen vessel? If I am the "spoon on gold" what is in me?

How does that nasty old TV show I watched mix into the incense? What about the picture on the internet or the off-color or raunchy joke I read or heard? My bouts with anger and self pity? What do these do to the incense mix?

It is like taking incense and mixing it with pig manure and then offering it to God. I hope that the good smells overpower the smell of the burning poop while knowing that it really can't. God notices. In the OT God was very specific when he told the Moses how to make incense and I am certain that unclean things were not part of the mix.

How much of my incense is unclean? Can this vessel even be cleaned enough to ever hold the incense? On my own the answers are – all of it – and NO.

BUT I have a high priest that stands before God on my account and makes me clean before God. He cleanses my vessel and makes it into a spoon of fine gold and purifies my incense so it is a fitting offering. Does this mean I can just go on sinning and thank Jesus for doing all the work? NO. I must let God cleanse me and then live a cleansed life. I need to not fill the "spoon of gold" Jesus renders me with pig poop. I need to offer a pure incense to God, not because Jesus hasn't purified me but because it is my duty as a child of God to do so. Do I bring more honor to God by offering pig poop and asking Jesus to purify it or by offering pure incense and then letting Jesus purify it even further. Which is more honoring to God? This reminds me of where Paul writes about some that say that we should sin even more so Jesus' power can be more displayed. This is not the way it works. As Jesus is shown strong in my life I want to do more and more that demonstrates how he has cleansed me and by living my life in a manner more and more pleasing to God. I know I can never be a pure offering of incense and that there will always be some pig poop to be purified but I want to daily offer more and more pure incense to God. The incense of my life offered from this spoon of gold to God on a daily basis.  

II Kings 15 : 33

II Kings 15 : 33

Five and twenty years old was he when he began to reign, and he reigned sixteen years in Jerusalem. And his mother's name was Jerusha, the daughter of Zadok.

A king of Judah. He reigned 16 years and was 25 when he took the throne. In September I will be 5 and twenty years times 2 – am I ready yet to take a throne? What does that mean? I want Jesus to reign on my throne but how often do I push him aside so I can sit there?

This king only reigned for 16 years and then someone else took his place. He died , I am sure the later verses say how and who took over after him but isn't that the way with all earthly kings? They reign for a time then another takes their place and puts their ways into place setting aside the ways of the past king. If I am the "king" on the throne of my life I can make some changes that will last for a time but they will not be permanent and will not be in complete accord with God's will for my "kingdom." As with the kings of Israel and Judah there were good ones and bad ones but they all had their faults and follies. They all thought they were in charge and set themselves on the throne. When a man is on the throne Jesus, by default, isn't.

That is not how I want to live my life – I don't want the throne. I have struggled mightily the last 25 years, or so, of my life to be on the throne. I wanted to be in control of my destiny. I wanted to be the man with the plan. The go to guy. The king.

What did it get me? I studied law and accounting and got my degrees that sit molding in the garage. I racked up over 1/10 of a million dollars in debt and where am I?

I tried to build my own throne and the claim my own kingdom. And for all of this time I was a Christian that gave lip service to Jesus being on the throne. But I had pushed him aside – I wanted the throne. I didn't trust Him to look out for what I saw as my best. He needed my help and guidance to take care of me and my family. I told so many people that God sent me to law school and that he had a plan for me based on it. But looking back I never received a word of knowledge or prophecy about it. I don't remember ever having a revelation or feeling a strong voice of god telling me "this is the way, walk in it." I decided that I would be a lawyer and that God would bless it. I took the attitude that if he didn't want me to be a lawyer he could stop me but if he didn't I was going to bull through with it. And I did.

But to what avail? I find myself today disabled from my profession and trying to discover God's continuing plan for my life. I know he isn't done with me (even though at times I feel like he is) and that he loves me and is not mad at me (I also struggle here because I know I am mad at me).

I need to push aside thoughts of the throne and strive instead to be a "good and faithful servant" – whatever that means. I do not want to be like the ancient kings of Judah and fight for the throne. I have spent far to long in the chase of it and feel that like Solomon's son Absalom I have ended up hanging from a tree by my hair just waiting for someone to come and run me through with a spear. As he had found himself completely disabled and at the mercy of all I found myself hanging from a tree. But, unlike Absalom, I know that the one that found me was not going to run me through with a spear but instead would untangle me from the tree and then lead me along the path he set for me. The key is that I need to stop striving for the throne and just follow the King. My place may be to be his cup bearer, His mouthpiece or the guy that cleans the toilets but I know he has a place for me in HIS kingdom and I am learning more and more to trust him that he will lead me and my family into it.

THY KINGDOM COME, THY WILL BE DONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Joshua 19 : 35

Joshua 19 : 35
"And the fenced cities are Ziddim, Zer, and Hammath, Rakkath, and Chinnereth,"

What are my fenced cities? I live my life and ask God to help me but do I have cities that are fenced off with a “no God allowed” sign on them? What does this mean to me?
I know God loves me and wants the best for me and I know that to have the best for me I have to let God have complete control of my cities. I want to let him in and to tear down the fences but I don’t seem to know how. It is like they are there and I can’t see them but for a glance now and again until I find myself inside one of them.
My mind wanders like a child lost in the woods looking for a place to play andf the next thing I know I am thinking on something I read or watched in the past that I thought I had forgotten, and it is never a good thing. I have let so much garbage into my mind over the years that has accumulated in these fenced cities that I need to clean out. What did the isaralites do when they came to a fenced city? Did they ignore it and say it is to strong for us or decide it is not a problem because it is fenced off? NO. They conquered it.
They went to war and destroyed it.
This is what I need to do. But how?
I have tried to win this battle in the past and have made strides in that direction but I still find myself in the fenced cities. Even at times that make no sense. I found myself in a nasty city in the middle of praise and worship – a thought about one thing let to another subject and to another and all of a sudden I was in the fenced city and struggled to get out. I can’t seem to just run out of the city once I get there – I have to fight to get past the fence. The inhabitants invite me in and even actively seek to drag me into the city but put up a fight when I try to leave.
I recognize that it is a trap of the enemy and that it is a result of choices I made in the past but I need to find cleansing from these cities. This would make a great book if only I had the answers to some (any) of the questions that I could say worked for me.
I know all the trite answers, read the bible more – pray more – think on the scriptures more – listen to Christian music more – ask God for deliverance - . . . .
I have done all of these and have made pretty good strides toward staying out of the cities but I still find myself there now and again. As soon as I recognize where I am I fight to leave and get back where I belong but I am distressed to have found myself there again. The simplest things draw me into the cities. The sight of the name of a website – a passing pretty lady – a flash of anger – a completely unrelated thought – it just seems so random.
I want to be free from these cities – I don’t want to just not visit them I want them destroyed. As God told the Israelites to do – every inhabitant and animal and thing in the cities need to be destroyed and the city raised.
But how?
I have asked God for wisdom and to do it Himself but so far I still find the cities there. God give me the wisdom to raise these cities – to break down their fences and to finally and forever conquer them. I am a child of God and I need to live my life free from the old cities.

The Acts 27 : 34

The Acts 27 : 34 Wherefore I pray you to take some meat: for this is for your health: for there shall not an hair fall from the head of any of you.

When we are in a problem we need to take care to take care of ourselves. All too often we find ourselves so wrapped up in the problem that we fail to take care of ourselves. This was happening to Paul and the others on the ship with him. They were so wrapped up in the storm and trying to save the ship that they were neglecting themselves. As a result they were becoming weak and Got told them to take meat so they would have strength for what was to come. This is not to say that we need to take meat and not prepare for the storm. We are not to wine and dine and let the devil take the details. We have an obligation before God to prepare to the extent he has given us the ability and talents. But beyond this we need to give it up to Him. We cannot prevail in the trials to come our way if we let our bodies become weak and depleted. We need to be as a runner and train and prepare but at the same time take care of our physical needs. We need to take meat.

The other sailors on the ship with Paul must have thought he was daft to tell them to stop and eat during the storm but Paul realized that their lives were in God’s hands and there was nothing they could do but to prepare for what was to come. I would not want to see myself having spent all my energies and talents preparing for something and then to fail just before the line because I failed to take care of my physical needs. These sailors thought they were to save the ship but Paul knew that the ship was lost and they needed to prepare to save their own lives. To do this they would need physical strength and sustenance, they would need to take meat.

 I think the wonderful part of this as well is that God was telling them to take a breather and recognize that even though things seemed bleak God was in control. They needed to take meat for their health and that not a hair would fall form their heads.

In the end I think this verse is just a reminder that when we have done all we can do and have gone as far as our own abilities can take us we need to recognize that God is there and that even though we may be trying to save the ship He is saving our lives and souls. If only the men with Paul had recognized that all their labor was in vain. They were trying so hard to save a doomed ship instead of preparing for what God had next.

How often do we do this? God puts a storm in our path and we expend all out energies on trying to save something that God is wresting away from us to give us something else. These men knew that their lives depended on that ship but Paul knew that their lives depended on God. This is a lesson we all need to learn – the things of this world will pass away. Strong and beautiful today but tomorrow’s rubbish. All that lasts if God and His plans and ways.

If I can just grasp a hold of this and stop worrying about what he has taken away and hold on tight to the fact that I just need to take meat, for my health as not a hair will fall any of our heads. He set my ship on a course with a storm that has destroyed it.

I need now to let it go and trust him that he will protect me and my family and take us to the next stage of our lives. The ship was a temporary vessel to take me to a place but was not, as I thought, a permanent dwelling.

What is next God?

wrestling with God:

wrestling with God:
wrestling with God:
We read in the bible the story of Jacob (Israel) wrestling with God. But what does that mean?
Can a man truly wrestle with God? Can you beat God? Jacob did. "quote." But how can you beat God?
I imagine the situation similar to when Jesus walked the earth. He was fully God but also fully human. I can imagine him wrestling in the natural with his contemporaries as a child and young man.
Did he always win? Of course not. There were those that were physically stronger than him or more skilled in wrestling.
Could he have wrestled with Peter or John? If he wanted. Would he have won? Who knows but probably not, they were probably physically stronger than him and would have most likely beaten him with relative ease.
Could he have called down angels to help him? Of course. On the cross he said if he wanted he could have called down 12 legions of angels to assist him. He was fully God and had all that the concept entails at his disposal.
But he didn't use it. He lived as one of us here on earth so we would have a possible model of how to live our lives.
I think that as with Jacob prevailing with God it is clearly possible that when God has manifested himself as human he is fully human and not a super human. He was, and is, like us.
Jesus was a real man and as such he was able to win and lose but through it all he did not sin. That is the model I want to follow. Not the model of a God that I can never really compare to but that of a man like me. A man that has physical limits and still lives his life for God.

You shall know them by their fruit

You shall know them by their fruit

The other evening I was with a group and one of the people there, in essence, questioned the commitment and even Christianity of those who did not take part in a certain project at the church. The idea put forth was that you could tell their commitment based on their fruit and since they did not take part in that project their fruit was lacking, or non-existent.

I have spent quite a bit of time since then thinking on this and the more I think on it the more I believe this brother was completely wrong, Further, as his comments were made in the presence of a new believer I think his comments were inappropriate and dangerous to this brother’s faith. Thankfully on the way home I was able to talk to them and, I hope in some small manner straighten out the issue for them.

The issue though seems to be common within the Church. We seek to recognize each other by a certain standard of what fruit should be and not by their unique fruit.

It is clear that Jesus told us that we are to recognize a tree by its fruit. Luke 6:44 NIV (“Each tree is recognized by its own fruit. People do not pick figs from thornbushes, or grapes from briers.”) This being said Jesus also said we are not to look to a tree for a fruit different that what grows on it. To carry this thought a logical jump forward we are not to expect to find apples on a peach tree or oranges on a pear tree.

Does this mean the apple tree is not a valuable as the peach tree because it bears a different fruit? Or the orange is a second class tree because it does not bear pears?
Paul talked about this in 1 Corinthians 12 where he told the church at Corinth that “[t]here are different kinds of service, but the same Lord. There are different kinds of working, but in all of them and in everyone it is the same God at work.” 1 Cor. 12:5-6. He went on to use the analogy of the body and told them:

"12 Just as a body, though one, has many parts, but all its many parts form one body, so it is with Christ. 13 For we were all baptized by one Spirit so as to form one body—whether Jews or Gentiles, slave or free—and we were all given the one Spirit to drink. 14 Even so the body is not made up of one part but of many. 15 Now if the foot should say, “Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body,” it would not for that reason stop being part of the body. 16 And if the ear should say, “Because I am not an eye, I do not belong to the body,” it would not for that reason stop being part of the body. 17 If the whole body were an eye, where would the sense of hearing be? If the whole body were an ear, where would the sense of smell be? 18 But in fact God has placed the parts in the body, every one of them, just as he wanted them to be. 19 If they were all one part, where would the body be? 20 As it is, there are many parts, but one body. 21 The eye cannot say to the hand, “I don’t need you!” And the head cannot say to the feet, “I don’t need you!” 22 On the contrary, those parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, 23 and the parts that we think are less honorable we treat with special honor. And the parts that are unpresentable are treated with special modesty, 24 while our presentable parts need no special treatment. But God has put the body together, giving greater honor to the parts that lacked it, 25 so that there should be no division in the body, but that its parts should have equal concern for each other. 26 If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it. 27 Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it. 28 And God has placed in the church first of all apostles, second prophets, third teachers, then miracles, then gifts of healing, of helping, of guidance, and of different kinds of tongues. 29 Are all apostles? Are all prophets? Are all teachers? Do all work miracles? 30 Do all have gifts of healing? Do all speak in tongues? Do all interpret? 31 Now eagerly desire the greater gifts."

I find it to be clear that just because one believer is called to a particular work and another is not does not mean that the one is somehow deficient because they are not bearing a certain type of fruit. As Paul wrote ““[t]here are different kinds of service, but the same Lord. There are different kinds of working, but in all of them and in everyone it is the same God at work.” 1 Cor. 12:5-6.

If I am called to clean the bathroom and another is called to lead worship in the eyes of God both callings are equal. They are different kinds of service but they are being done for the same Lord. We are not all called to be eyes or hands or feet. We are called to be what God has made us. If you are called to bear a certain fruit but your brother is called to bear a different fruit that does not make you superior it just means that you have a talent that God is using in one way while your brother has a talent God is using in some other manner.

Jesus tells us to “to recognize a tree by its fruit.” Luke 6:44. If I see a tree with peaches hanging from its branches I recognize it as a peach tree, or an apple tree is recognized by the apples hanging from its branches. A believer is recognized by their fruit and, as in nature, there are a great many different fruits but the same Lord and they are all following their calling and purpose.

Thoughts on Samson

Thoughts on Samson

On Sunday last my Pastor taught on Samson and it got me thinking about him and his life.
In Numbers 6 the concept and rules of a Nazarite are described. What strikes me is that a Nazarite is made by the person making a vow to God that they will live as and abide by the three rules:

1. He shall separate [himself] from wine and strong drink, and shall drink no vinegar of wine, or vinegar of strong drink, neither shall he drink any liquor of grapes, nor eat moist grapes, or dried. All the days of his separation shall he eat nothing that is made of the vine tree, from the kernels even to the husk. Num 6:3-4
2. All the days of the vow of his separation there shall no razor come upon his head: until the days be fulfilled, in the which he separateth [himself] unto the LORD, he shall be holy, [and] shall let the locks of the hair of his head grow. Num 6:5
3. All the days that he separateth [himself] unto the LORD he shall come at no dead body. Num 6:6

My first issue is with his mother consecrating him as a Nazarite. Samson himself made no vow as a Nazarite – it was made for him and shaped his life. Her vow regarding Samson reminds me of The vow made by Samuel’s mother whereby she concentrated him to the Lord. Was Samuel also a Nazarite? (but that’s an issue for another day)
My big questions relate to the story of how Samson told Delilah that if his hair was cut off he would be weak as any man. This story has been told and retold.
I wonder, however, if Samson really believed that cutting his hair would leave him weak as any man?
In his life he had the three rules set out above to live by.
However, we are told that he had already broken two of them.
First, in Judges 14 he kills a lion and then comes back later to the dead body and removes honey from it to eat. In Judges 14:19 he killed 30 men. In Judges 15:10 he took up the jawbone of an ass, defiling himself with another dead body, and then slew 1000 men. So all told he came upon some 1032 dead bodies at least.
Second, in Judges 14:10 he hosts a feast, “of the type the young men used to do.” A feast of this type would have presumably involved the drinking of wine and strong drink.
All that was left was his hair. Could Samson have thought that as God had not taken away his strength when he violated the other two conditions of the Nazarite vow that God was never going to take it away. That he was special and that the vow was not the source of his strength but that it was something that came to him apart from the vow? That God would not hold him to the rules? That he was special?
This would explain why he told Delilah that if his hair was cut he would be weak. If he thought that it was just another rule that he could break without any consequences then why not tell her. To me this makes much more sense than his telling her the truth knowing that she had tried every other time to use what he told her against him.
Why would he tell her his secret if he really thought it was the secret. To me a better option is that he thought that it would not matter and that God would just continue to bless him anyway.
I don’t believe that there was anything magical about the cutting of Samson’s hair. The issue was his throwing God’s grace back into His face and figuring that because God had shown grace before that He was obligated to continue to show grace and bless him regardless of what Samson did.
Was the cause of Samson’s loss of his strength the cutting of his hair or his presumption that God would continue to bless him regardless of his sin?
How often do we do this? We see God’s grace as a license to keep sinning and to do worse because we figure God will just look the other way and continue to bless us regardless of what we have done. Do we, like Samson, go on sinning and just assume that God will bless us because he always has in the past?
This reminds me of where Paul asks the rhetorical question “What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin, that grace may abound?” Romans 6:1. As Paul continues “God forbid. How shall we, that are dead to sin, live any longer therein?” Romans 6:2.
I see one of the key lessons of the Samson story to be that while God’s grace is sufficient at a certain point He will take his hand of blessing away from us if we continue in our sin.
I believe the Church needs to strive to discover where, as with Samson, we continue in our sins and just assume that God will bless us anyways.
Search me God and show me where I am failing so I can repent and turn away from my sin and follow you more closely.

Wrestling at the Altar

Wrestling at the Altar

Question for you. Have you ever seen someone alone at the altar in prayer? Wrestling with an issue that only God can resolve? Wrestling alone?

I have come to believe that there is no excuse for any believer to be wrestling alone at the altar when there is another believer in the building. This does not necessarily mean getting on your knees next to them and asking questions or trying to interject into their prayer. It usually means standing or kneeling near them and praying for strength and wisdom for them. You do not need to know what they are praying for to pray for them and to be there for them. It is like a solider in a fight. His comrades don’t leave for lunch and let one man fight by themselves, they fight as a team because they all have the same enemy and fight for the same cause.

Another issue I have thought about a lot lately is how we pray. Have you ever been actually taught how to pray? Have you ever had a mature Christian actually sit down with you and tell you to do this and that and how they do it, or did you learn just by doing it? I recognize that prayer is an intensely personal thing and that what works for one person may not work for another, that being said there are some basics that hold true regardless. What are they? Where do we learn them?

It is clear that we are not beyond the direct attack of the enemy. Paul tells us in Ephesians 6: 10-18 to take up out whole armor of God for we wrestle with the enemy. This is not a picture of standing at 20 paces and debating theology. The term Paul uses for the conflict is palē which is defined in Strong's Concordance as a “a contest between two in which each endeavors to throw the other, and which is decided when the victor is able to hold his opponent down with his hand upon his neck.” Crucial to this verse is the recognition that this wrestling match is not between the devil and unbelievers but between the devil and mature Christians, Paul does not here say that the Ephesians alone wrestle but that “we wrestle” meaning Paul, you and I also wrestle against the devil.

This makes me think about a kid just joining the wrestling team. He has watched others wrestle and now he wants to do it. So he gets out on the mat and flails around with great determination and almost no idea what he is really doing. We would never dream of asking them to take on the team leader or some state champion wrestler. We recognize that they need a time of training before they even attempt to wrestle a match for real. This is where their teammates and coach come in to the picture. A good teammate will wrestle with the new kid and show them how it is done. They will sit down with them when they are struggling and build them up, or if necessary pull them back when they try to go too far too fast.

Their coach is there to teach them the moves and to get them into shape. I remember wrestling practices, hours of exercises and stretches to get ready for a match that only lasts a few minutes. But without this training and conditioning you would never have the strength and endurance to make it too the end of the match. Imagine a team of wrestlers with no coach and where each kid does his or her own thing. I doubt they would see many victories and would, quite probably, end up with the kids being injured.

I have seen so many wrestling matches won and lost not because of the skill and moves of a wrestler but by who can outlast the other, who is in the best condition. Likewise I have seen wrestlers that were clearly weaker than their opponent win because they knew the moves and how to execute them.

As a church we cannot let the new kid wrestle alone. We are all the team. Our pastors and leaders in the church are the coaches. When we see a believer in prayer we need to support them. If appropriate we need to give them some tips. We need to let them see us in prayer so they can see how we do it. They may be awkward and at times they may say or ask things that seem off-base but they are trying to learn. Help them learn, encourage them, lift them up, remember you too once were the new kid on the team.

Likewise we need coaches that will get down on the mat with us and show us the moves. They need to show us how to build up our spiritual muscles and conditioning so we can wrestle for the long fight. In wrestling a good coach is someone that not only knows how to wrestle but can do it. They can get on the mat and show the moves and are in shape to last the entire match. They are not ashamed to have their team see them in a wrestling match and encourage their team to support them in the match.

I thank God that I have been blessed with being on good teams and having pastors in my life that were good coaches. But, they could have done much better. We all can do much better. We must wrestle as a team and together we will win because we have the ultimate coach who has never lost a match.

Just some thoughts on a Tuesday morning.

Rod

BLESS YOU

“Bless you”
You sneezed
I said it
But, what does it mean?
History says it is a blessing because you are expelling demons.
We need to reclaim it.
When we say “Bless you,” we need to mean it
Turn it into a short heartfelt prayer
Turn a sneeze into an excuse to pray for someone
“God Bless You”

CONSIDER JOB’S WIFE

CONSIDER JOB’S WIFE

In one day Mrs. Job lost all of her children and all of her family’s wealth. Shortly thereafter her husband was stricken with a disease of boils from the top of his head to the soles of his feet. She lost everything and had no hope of it getting better. Her angst can be seen in her comment to Job, “are you still maintaining your integrity? Curse God and die!” Job 2:9 (NIV). I do not see this as a sign of a moral deficit on her part but as the sign of a person pushed to their breaking point. Job’s response to her seems to back this up in that he tells her “You are talking like a foolish woman. Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?” Job 2:10 (NIV). In saying this Job’s reaction to her appears to be surprise that she is acting out of character. His comment seems to be his reminding her of a truth she already knows but has, in her grief, looked past.
Another interesting example to consider is Bathsheba. The story of how David took her as his wife and the death of their first born is a well worn path. We never consider how this death affected Bathsheba. Her son is dead because of something David did. The Scriptures make it clear that David was the one being dealt with but she is suffering as much if not more than him. At least David knew why the child died.
To me the interesting part of these stories is what these women went through so their husbands could learn a truth about God. God’s Plan to provide a lesson to Job and David, and through them to all of us, cost Mrs. Job literally almost everything she had and cost Bathsheba her child. And it wasn’t even about them.
This challenges me to consider if the things I am going through in my life are meant as a learning and training point for me or if I am just a part of someone else’s lesson. Is it possible that my suffering is not the center of the world? That God can be permitting what I am going through as a side-effect of someone else’s training?
How often do we go to God and ask him for relief from whatever is troubling us without recognizing that we are in effect asking God to stop working in another’s life. Or how often are we like Job and David and perhaps we are the one God is working on but we neglect to consider those effected by what is happening in our lives.
I know with my bi-polar that I am, at times, a challenge to live with for my family and that they are suffering alongside me but I don’t always consider this. I act like I am the center of the world. Something I need to consider is that perhaps my Bi-polar is not about me but is there to teach my family a lesson they will need later in life and I am just the vessel being used for their training.
In the end it all falls back to God’s plans being above and beyond us. God has a plan for what we are each dealing with and perhaps someday we will understand it and perhaps not. This doesn’t lessen the fact that God is in control and that when we question God’s plan we are acting like a “foolish woman” and we need to remember Job’s admonitions that: “Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?” and “I know that you can do all things; no purpose of yours can be thwarted. You asked, ‘Who is this that obscures my plans without knowledge?’ Surely I spoke of things I did not understand, things too wonderful for me to know.” Job 2:9 (NIV) & Job 42: 2-3 (NIV)

The Bread Of My Necessity

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The Light Under The Stairs – three true stories from my childhood

I remember those nights like few others in my life. All my life I have been a bit afraid of the dark – except for those nights.



The first was when I was quite young, maybe 6 or 7, I was asleep in my room and awoke to a noise in the room and looked over towards my brothers bunk bed across the room and I know I saw something run across his bedrail and then disappear. At the time all I could think about was what was a squirrel doing in the room, I watched for a while and it never appeared again. Instead of being afraid I just rolled over and went back to sleep. Over the years I looked for my squirrel friend again but he never came back.



The second was when I was 8 or 10 and sharing a room with my brothers. In the middle of the night I heard someone call my name and for some reason I knew that it was ok, even though I didn’t recognize the voice it seemed to call me to it. “Rodney” it called and I found myself irresistibly drawn to it. I remember getting out of bed and heading down the hall – the voice was sooooo quiet I had to stop and hold still to hear it. But, then it would be there again. “Rodney.” I followed it threw the living room and out into the dining room where I could still hear it calling me. It lead me to the corner of the dining room next to my dad’s chair and facing Mom’s china cabinet, I heard it one last time. I finally answered the voice by saying “what.” I never heard the voice again. I should have been terrified but instead I was completely calm and just went back to bed. Over the next years I would often think about the voice and would listen in the night for the voice. I even went so far as going back out by the cabinet to listen more than a few times.



The last time was the light. I was about 12 and was sleeping in my big brother’s room in the basement, a special treat, In the night I awoke and had to go to the bathroom. There was no light in the room and try as I could I couldn’t find the door. I was getting scared but I had to pee. After a bit I found the closet and realizing that it connected to the closet in the other room I crawled threw it into the family room. There were no lights and the room was completely dark except for the light under the stairs. Under the stairs a soft light glowed giving me just enough light to see my way up stairs and back down and into the room. There was only one problem – there was no light under the stairs. Over the next years I looked countless times for the source of the light. I turned on different lights and crawled around under the stairs and there was simply no light – no electricity and no hole threw which light could have come from another room. There is absolutely no question in my mind that the light was there and gave comfort to a scared little boy.



These stories are all true and happened to me.

mental illness thoughts and statistics

Clinical depression and bipolar are medical conditions caused by a chemical imbalance in the individual’s brain. They are no different than a disease such as diabetes that is caused by a chemical imbalance in the individual’s body that throws off their blood sugar levels.
Diabetes is comparable to bi-polar / depression in that medical science knows it exists from its symptoms but doesn’t fully understand what causes it. As recognized by the Mayo Clinic “Type 2 diabetes develops when the body becomes resistant to insulin or when the pancreas stops producing enough insulin. Exactly why this happens is unknown.”
Despite billions of dollars on cancer research it was only in 1998 that it was actually determined how cigarettes caused cancer. Before then it was simply a theory based on correlation and circumstances. It is still not known exactly how, and many will say if, the sun and asbestos cause cancer.
Countless millions have been spent on the cause of rheumatoid arthritis, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, Alzheimer’s disease, gulf war syndrome, multiple chemical sensitivity syndrome, sarcoidosis, inflammatory bowel disease, fibromyalgia, primary open-angle glaucoma, and many other diseases but to date, medical science has no clear answer to what causes them and in many cases can only diagnose them based on their symptoms and by exclusion, the same as most mental illnesses.
The National Alliance on Mental Illness defines mental illnesses as “medical conditions that disrupt a person’s thinking, feeling, mood, ability to relate to others, and daily functioning. Just as diabetes is a disorder of the pancreas, mental illnesses are medical conditions that often result in a diminished capacity for coping with the ordinary demands of life.”
WebMD notes that “Although the exact cause of most mental illnesses is not known, it is becoming clear through research that many of these conditions are caused by a combination of biological, psychological, and environmental factors.” They go on to identify the biological factors as an abnormal balance of neurotransmitters in the brain; defects and/or injury to the brain; genetics; infections; prenatal damage; substance abuse; poor nutrition and toxins (such as lead). They also recognize that psychological factors such as childhood psychological trauma (emotional / physical / sexual abuse); loss of a loved one at a young age; neglect and a poor ability to relate to others as well as environmental stressors such as death of a loved one; divorce; a bad family life; poverty; feelings of inadequacy, low self-esteem, anxiety, anger or loneliness; life changes; social and cultural expectations; and substance abuse issues can trigger mental illness.
Numerous studies have demonstrated that mental illness is very common. The National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) estimates that 20.9 percent of Americans ages 18 and older suffer from a non-substance abuse mental disorder in any given year. Based on the US Census bureau estimates for 2010 49.1 million people in the US will have some form of a diagnosable mental disorder and 14.1 Million people, 6% of the population, will suffer from a severe mental illness in 2010.
More than 90 percent of people who kill themselves have a diagnosable mental disorder, most commonly a depressive disorder or a substance abuse disorder. The 2005 National Healthcare Quality Report estimates that 11.3% of adults age 18 and over with serious psychological distress will commit suicide. The Center for Disease Control (CDC) reports that for every completed suicide there are 25 attempted suicides. In 2007, 395,320 people were treated in an emergency department for a self-inflicted injury and 165, 997 were hospitalized for a self-inflicted injury. The CDC also noted that in 2007 14.5% of students in grade 9-12 considered suicide in the prior year and 6.9% reported a suicide attempt.
Based on these numbers, approximately 800 thousand people in the US will attempt suicide in 2010. Of those over 395 thousand will end up in an emergency room with a self-inflicted injury and over 32 thousand will die.
If we look at this from the eyes of the Church the numbers are staggering.
The American Religious Identity Survey (ARIS), conducted in 2001, documents that 76.5% of the US population describe themselves as Christians.
That means that of the 14.1 million people with a severe mental illness 10.7 million of them are Christians. Assuming a 38% reduction in suicidal behavior from the general public as a result of the individual’s religious beliefs, approximately 380,000 Christians in the US will attempt suicide in 2010. Of those about 187,000 will end up in an emergency room with a self-inflicted injury and over 15,000 of our Brothers and Sisters in the Lord will die.
Further, based on these numbers, if your church has 100 kids in its senior high youth group, grades 9-12, nine of them have considered suicide this year and four of them have or will attempt suicide this year.
Researching this issue makes it abundantly clear that mental illness and suicidal behavior is epidemic in society and the Church and that most of society and the vast, vast majority of the medical and scientific community recognize that a mental illness is not a personal weakness, or a character defect and that recovery is not simply a matter of self-discipline or will.

NOVEMBER 15, 2010

I am NOT bound,
there is no lock
The door is broken,
its hinges shattered
The door was broken along with the temple veil

Stop asking for deliverance
You walk in and out
You say it is a bondage
A chain from satan
It is a choice
NOT a Chain

I am done dealing with this Choice
NO ONE makes me eat three eggs, swimming in butter, along with 3 pieces of toast, also liberally buttered for breakfast.
I choice to eat when no-one is here to see me
I alone make the sandwiches, raid the leftovers, eat the chips.
Today it stops!

Tear Out The Tares

Went walking tonight with my dog, Ausker, and noticed something I have seen hundreds of time but saw tonight for the first time. In the soybean fields around my house are hundreds of corn plants that have sprung up among the thousands of soybean plants. It reminded me of the parable of the wheat and the tares.
I thought of it in a different way tonight. The tares are those things that the enemy has planted in my life to steal away from the good plants in my life. The part that gave me pause was thinking about how many of those tares I have spent valuable time tending and watering. Anger, lust, self-pity, defeat, and so many others that I not only permit in my life but, seem to find some perverse pleasure in. I have gone so far as telling people that anger is my friend that is always there whenever I need him. I find myself immersed in lustful thoughts, wallowing in self-pity and defeat and just generally tolerating the tares instead of killing them off.
God help me to tear out the tares. To hit them with the weed killer – starve them – crush them and cleanse your field (my life).

7 years for taping a cop?

Imagine That

Picture this – you are walking down the street minding your own business when you see a police officer stops a young man. Out of boredom you pull out your cell phone and start recording the encounter. Suddenly the officer begins to holler at the young man and then repeatedly strikes him. Other officers show up and the young man is arrested.

One of the officers sees you recording them and:

A) Takes your phone as “evidence”

B) Arrests you for wiretapping

C) Tells you to move along

If you live in PA or several other states A and B are real possibilities. Several courts and police departments have taken the position that recording the police in a public place while they are doing their job is wiretapping since the police did not “consent” to the recording. If this is in fact the law then every time you videotape anyone without their consent – regardless of the situation – such as a crowd at a concert or even the people having fun at Hershey park you are conceivably guilty of wiretapping, a third degree felony on PA, and could go to jail for up to seven years.

If you think I am overstating the issue consider the case of Anthony Graber, a 25 year old Staff Sergeant with the Maryland Air National Guard. Sgt Graber taped an encounter with a Maryland State Police Officer where the officer is accused of improper behavior. Graber later posted the tape on YouTube and, as one would expect, as soon as the Police saw how their officer behaved Sgt Graber received an apology and the officer was reprimanded, the police arrested Sgt. Graber for violating Maryland’s wiretapping law. The Sgt is now dealing with the charges and if convicted could spend 16 years in jail. See http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/06/15/AR2010061505556.html

In Illinois the legislature has actually made it illegal to tape anyone without their consent, including a police officer beating a kid for no reason. While the law was passed to protect police from having their actions recorded the law would also, presumably, mean that if you want to tape at a concert or a parade or just an elementary school recital you need to get the consent of everyone in the crowd or risk going to jail.

There is currently a resolution pending in the congress directed at this issue. However, it is not a binding statement of law. H.CON.RES.298.IH

Think about the ramifications of this situation and consider mentioning to your elected officials that Pennsylvania needs to consider adopting the laws of the other states and/or the federal government, or at the very least, amending PA law to make it clear that videotaping the police in a public location is NOT wiretapping.

what am I?

I see so many things I want to be and do. But I don't do them.

I hear a call in my heart to follow but I sit instead.

who am I - what am I?

am I a Christian or a christian?

BIG C or little c?

Grands Allowance Rebate System

GARS

The White House is proud to announce that they will be submitting a bill to Congress designed to reduce the cost of healthcare in the United States while at the same time reducing unemployment and freeing up needed resources currently serving an unproductive market.

Starting September 01, 2009, you can trade in your Grands (any related individual over 75 years of age) for a rebate on your next years taxes. For every Grand turned in you will receive a rebate in the amount of $7,500 that can be used toward the purchase of a home, vehicle or other needed household appliances.

It is anticipated that the GARS program will result in the removal of 15 – 30 million unproductive and non-cost effective individuals from our society in the first year. By removing these individuals, having a limited quality of life, we will free up in excess of $1.5 billion that would have gone towards their medical care each year.

Additionally, their removal from the job pool will free up a great number of positions for younger and more productive workers. Finally, the removal of these individuals, many of which have significant financial assets tied up, will, by operation of state probate laws, put these assets in the hands of individuals better able to utilize the funds in the economy and thus will turn the tide of the recession back to a time of prosperity.

Similar Bills dealing with the problems of the mentally challenged and those with limited intelligence are being readied for submission to Congress in the weeks to come.